Hotel bibles for atheist China? Where are the Upanishads?

Today I read on scotsman.com that the China Patriotic Catholic Association (CPCA), the official state-controlled body for Christian Catholicism in China, recently introduced a novel idea at the National Committee of the Chinese People’s Political Consultative Conference:

“A large number of foreign athletes and tourists will swarm into Beijing for the Games, a majority of whom have religious belief, and providing Bibles at hotels will meet their religious needs.”

Of course! The 150 nations competing at the 2008 Olympics and the 6 billion people represented around the world will have all their spiritual bases covered by this single important act. Please ask the Gideons to ship 100,000 bibles immediately so we may place them in the little drawers next to the mini-bar. The spokesman for CPCA, Liu Banyan, goes on to say

“The Bible is a must at hotel rooms in foreign countries, especially European countries. The service can help clear up foreigners’ misunderstandings of China in the area of religion.”

A “must“. By Mr. Banyan’s account, it is an essential fixture, like a bed, hot water, and the complimentary copy of the New York Times I always seem to trip over on my way to meetings. The article goes on to state that the report did not mention other religions. Which is understandable, because Mr. Banyan, (may I call you Liu?), stated a bible is sufficient to meet everyone’s religious needs. I’m not sure who deserves more flak: the Catholics’ pathetically veiled proselytizing attempt during an international sporting event, or officially atheist China’s need to appear so open and free for these short months before reverting back to its normally constrictive policies.

So I’m sorry, Liu Banyan, I’m paying $250 a night for this room, and that drawer space is going to my copy of the īśāvāsya upaniṣad.